Fetish Of The Month: Barely Legal Turtles Who Lives In Sewers
It’s hard to find a good man, but very easy to find a six foot tall turtle.
How Each Zodiac Sign Will Ruin Your Carefully Planned Art Heist
Your failure is written in the stars.
For The Last Time, I’m An Electrician, Not An Energy Healer
I truly don’t know how much clearer I can be on this.
What Nail Polish To Wear Based On Who You’re Flipping Off Today
Because it definitely will be someone.
I’m So Woke I Only Come On Women’s Minds
Ladies, we all know a faux feminist or two, talking a good game but failing to deliver when it really counts. But I don’t just talk the talk, I walk the walk, valuing women enough to splooge on their thoughts—not just their faces. That’s right. I’m so woke I only come on women’s minds. Our […]
I’m Building A Neighborhood Garden No Matter What My Asshole Neighbors Say
Those ingrates will thank me later.
A Handy Recipe For Homemade Adderall
Save yourself some money (and a visit with your “guy”) by making your own Adderall at home. Now FOCUS.
Back-To-School Sales For Regressing Back To When You Had Hope
Yes, the earth is dying, but check out these glitter pens!
Boost Your Immune System With Ball Pit Immersion Therapy
Build up you defenses in the most disgusting place on earth!
Coat Your Dick In Wax, Just Like Ryan Gosling Does (Possibly)
It’s trending on Twitter, so we’re gonna say it’s true.
My Morning Routine: I Lick Everything In The House So It Stays Mine
When you grow up in a house with seven brothers you learn certain habits that last a lifetime.
We’re Out Of Cute Mythological Animals, So Let’s Be Harpies, Ladies!
Because it’s literally all that’s left.
What To Do With That Icelandic Elf You Accidentally Murdered
It was somewhere between Reykjavík and Midborg.
Introducing Culk-Inn, The World’s First Macaulay Culkin-Themed Luxury Hotel
Note: We only serve cheese pizza.
Preparing Your Guest House In The Event That The Boys Are Back In Town
Guess who just got back today?
Travel Guide: The Inside Of A JNCO Jeans Leg
These jeans are the ultimate staycation location for those times you want to get away but don’t want to go very far.
How To Talk About The Books You Only Bought Because They’re Pretty
Use words like ‘imagery’ and ‘prose.’
Our Staff Medium Glimpsed The Afterlife, And Honestly It’s Hot Garbage
We don’t recommend dying anytime soon.
Become An Organizational Wizard By Asking Actual Wizards For Help
They mostly told us to optimize vertical space?